OOTD: Choker Face

THE SUN IS OUT. I repeat: THE SUN IS OUT. Soz for caps but this is such a rarity and I’m actually mildly excited about it. Today is an example of weather that I can get on board with; it’s sunny enough to look positively majestic but cold enough to save me from getting a sweat on.

OOTD: Little Leggy Bow Peep

Anyone who knows me knows that I am not leggy. Not one iota. Not at all. Standing at a mere 5’5″, I have been blessed with a large derriere and cursed with tiny tits. Okay, maybe ‘cursed’ is a bit strong but I do sometimes wish a smidgen of the fat from my ass could travel upward (not too much though ’cause I’m still hoping to pull Kanye and he’s clearly an ass man).

OOTD: Boyfriend Jacket Central

The Boyfriend Jacket AKA the only boyfriend you need in your life: Keeps you warm, looks good both on and off the hanger, just the right height and attracts more compliments a day than any man would ever think to give.

OOTD: What I Wear To WERK #8

Ordinarily I’d write a witty paragraph or anecdote about my week but ain’t nobody got time for that today. I’ve just been hit by a delayed proseccoma after a night of alcolols and I’m feeling lackadaisical.

OOTD: What I Wear To WERK #6

Holidays are coming (holidays are coming, holidays are coming… always COCA COLA!) and I am so, so, so ready to SLEEP. I am full of the spirit of the season all year round – I start watching Elf and Miracle on 34th St in January in preparation for the looming festivities that are 12 months away; I am a Christmas whore. If it’s got fairy lights on it, I’ll visit it. If fake snow is strewn across the floor, I will grace that floor with my presence.

PFW: Ellery SS14

Oh god, I love Ellery. Like, I really love Ellery. I really love their silhouettes, I really love their use of silks and I really,…

OOTD: What I Wear To WERK #5

Heeeeeeeeeey yaa, heeeey yaaaaa! Totally been a busy little bee recently so haven’t had time for lunchtime jaunts to snap da blog shots or provide your life with a veritable feast of tits and ass paired with a smorgasbord of sass.